一句话英文

一句话英文 1.I am in shape. Round is a shape. 2. the beauty is the beast 2、I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car. 3、Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience 4.The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list. 5.How's your wife and my kids? 6.Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off NOW! 7、We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police. 8."Your future depends on your dreams." So go to sleep. 9.Hard work never killed anybody." But why take the risk? 10.Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason. 11.War does not determine who is right - only who is left. 12.Remember, when someone annoys you, it takes 42 muscles in your face to frown, but it only takes four muscles to extend your arm and smack the asshole in the head. 13.Yo mama's so fat, I gotta take three steps back just to see all of her 14.He who laughs last think slowest. All is well that ends well 15.Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car. 16.My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch. 17.I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks. 20.Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening', and then proceed to tell you why it isn't. 26.I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian 27.A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station.. 28.If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong. White lie 29.Did you know that dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish? 32.Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up. 38.A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory. Skeleton Sins crimes Noah Ark bible Satan 39.Good girls are bad girls that never get caught. 40.He who smiles in a crisis has found someone to blame. Is i…z 41.Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy 44.To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research. 45.Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go. 54.It's not the fall that kills you; it's the sudden stop at the end. 56、Never hit a man with glasses. Hit him with a baseball bat. 57.Why are they called "apartments" when they are all stuck together? Villa pun 58.If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight. —— 59.Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Because they have big fingers. 60.Do you believe in love at first sight or would you want me to walk by? 61.I tried to go Christmas shopping last year, but I didn't have no money. I just went window-shopping with a brick. Halloween cosplay costume 62.A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well. Income tax 63.It's a well known fact. If you stand on the Great Wall of China... You can actually see the moon. 64.I was totally disgusted today. I was sat on the bus... ...And not one single person offered my pregnant wife their seat.