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2016新年英语小笑话2016新年英语小笑话   新年是个开心的日子,为了让大家放松一下,下面为大家带来2016新年英语小笑话,希望大家喜欢!   新年英语小笑话一:   Send the Bill to My FatherDoctor: ″I can do nothing for your complaint. It is hereditary.″Patient: ″then send the bill to my father,please.″   新年英语小笑话二:   The Swimmer  The teacher told...

2016新年英语小笑话
2016新年英语小笑话   新年是个开心的日子,为了让大家放松一下,下面为大家带来2016新年英语小笑话,希望大家喜欢!   新年英语小笑话一:   Send the Bill to My FatherDoctor: ″I can do nothing for your complaint. It is hereditary.″Patient: ″then send the bill to my father,please.″   新年英语小笑话二:   The Swimmer  The teacher told the class the story of a man who swam a river three times before breakfast.  Johnny laughed.  "Do you doubt that a good swimmer could do that?" asked the teacher.  "No, sir," answered Johnny, "but I wonder why he did not swim it four times and get back to the side where his clothes were."   新年英语小笑话三:   One evening, in the midst of dinner preparation, our 10-year-old daughter asked, "Mommy, what's puberty?" My wife was rushed at the moment, so she suggested that Peggy look up the word in the dictionary, after which they could talk about it.   A few minutes later, Peggy returned. Her mother asked what the dictionary had said. "Puberty means," announced Peggy, "the earliest age at which a girl is able to bear children."   "What do you think of that?" my wife asked.   "I'm not sure," Peggy relied. "I've always been able to bear children. It's adults I can't bear.".   【更多关于新年的笑话推荐】   趣味幽默笑话:新年决心书   Hoping to excite student interest in our reading center, I asked each teacher to write a New Year's resolution on a special form and send it to me. After I posted the resolutions on the bulletin board in the reading center, one young teacher stopped by, looked at them for a few minutes,and then left abruptly. Passing two teachers on their way in , she stormed,"My resolution isn’t posted一and mine was one of the first ones in!”I couldn’t help but overhear, and the tone of her voice sent me flying to my desk in search of a misplaced resolution. Looking rapidly through stacks of papers,I uncovered hers. It read, "I resolve not to let little things upset me.   为了激励同学们对我们阅览中心的兴趣,我请每位老师在一张特制的表格上写一篇新年决心书交给我。我将决心书张贴在阅览中心的布告牌上之后,一位年轻老师停下来看了几分钟,便走过来。她越过两位老师闯了进来,大发雷霆道:“我的决心书竟然没有贴出来—而我的决心书是第一批交上来的。”我在旁边听到了,看她气势汹汹的样子,我吓得赶紧跑回办公室去找那份放错了地方的决心书。飞快浏览了几叠纸之后,我打开了她的那一份,上面写着:我决心不再为一些小事而烦恼。   趣味幽默笑话:基本原则   One of my favorite teachers at Southeast Missouri State University in Cape Girardeau was known of his droll sense of humor. Explaining his ground rules to freshman class,he said, "Now I know my lectures can often be dry and boring, so I don't mind if you look at your watches during class. I do,however, object to your pounding them on the desk to make sure they’re still running.”   位于吉拉多海角的密苏里东南州立大学有一位我非常喜欢的老师,他奇特的幽默感很是出名。在对一个新生班级讲解他的基本原则时,他说:“我知道我的讲课可能经常会枯燥乏味,了无兴趣,所以如果你们在上课时看表我并不介意。不过我坚决反对你们将表在课桌上猛敲,看它们是不是还在走。”   趣味幽默笑话:逼真的戏剧   When I taught the introduction一to一theater course at North Dakota State University,I required my students to attend the university theater' s current production and write a critique, After viewing a particularly fine performance, one student wrote: "The play was so real, I thought I was actually sitting on my couch at home, watching it on television.”   我在北达科他州立大学教戏剧人门课时, 要求 对教师党员的评价套管和固井爆破片与爆破装置仓库管理基本要求三甲医院都需要复审吗 学生们去看学校剧团当时的演出,并写一篇评论。看了一场极为精彩的演出后,一名学生写道:“这部戏剧是如此逼真,以致于我认为自己是坐在家里的沙发上,从电视上看到的。”   趣味幽默笑话:他的答案只比正确答案多二   Jack Hawkins was the football coach at an American college, and he was always trying to find good players,but they weren't always smart enough to be accepted by the college.   杰克·霍金斯是美国一所学院的榄球队教练,他竭力想物色好球员。但是好球员学业不行,学校不愿录取。   One day the coach brought an excellent young player to the dean of the college and asked that the student be allowed to enter without an examination. "Well,”the dean said after some persuasion, "I’d better ask him a few questions first.”   有一天,教练带着一位优秀的年轻球员去见院长,希望院方同意他免试人学。经过一番劝说后院长说:“那我最好先问问他几个问 快递公司问题件快递公司问题件货款处理关于圆的周长面积重点题型关于解方程组的题及答案关于南海问题 。”   Then he turned to the student and asked him some very easy questions, but the student didn't know any of the answers.   然后他转向学生,问了几个非常简单的问题。可是那个学生一个也答不上来。   At last the dean said, "Well, what’s five times seven?"   最后院长说:“那么,五乘七得多少?”   The student thought for a long time and then answered, "Thirty一six.”   学生想了很久,然后回答说:“三十六。”   The dean threw up his hands and looked at the coach in despair, but the coach said earnestly,"Oh, please let him in, sir! He was only wrong by two.”   院长摊开双手失望地看了看教练。可是教练认真地说,“噢,录取他吧,先生。他的答案只比正确答案多二。”
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