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首页 604 The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance

604 The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance.doc

604 The One Where Joey Loses Hi…

nkliuqi
2018-09-08 0人阅读 举报 0 0 暂无简介

简介:本文档为《604 The One Where Joey Loses His Insurancedoc》,可适用于文学艺术领域

TheOneWhereJoeyLosesHisInsuranceScene:MonicaandRachel's,RachelispackingherbelongingstomovetoRoss’sShe’sstandinginthekitchenRachel:So,whichofthiskitchenstuffismineMonica:Thisbottleopener(Shegrabsitoffofthefreezerdoor)Rachel:AndMonica:Andit’samagnet!Rachel:Lookatthat!Ross:HowweirdisthatY’knowYou’removinginwithmeandhavetheonethingIdon’thaveIt’slikeuh,inawayyouyoucompleteme(Phoebeglaresathim)kitchenRachel:What!Ross:(inanAustralianaccent)Youcompletemekitchen,matey!Phoebe:Ross,Iknowwhatyou’rethinkingRoss:WhatPhoebe:Thatshe’sgonnamoveinwithyouandmaybethenshe’llfallinlovewithyouandthenwhenshefindsoutyou’realreadymarried,she’lljustbehappyY’knowYou’rejust,you’reverysadRoss:Oh…my…God!IIseewhatthisis!YouareinlovewithRachel!Phoebe:What!!Ross:Ofcourse!Italladdsup!Imeanyouyou’reobsessedwithherIt’salways,"Ross,whatareyougonnadoaboutRachel""Ross,whywhyareyoumovinginwithRachel""WhenareyougonnaconfessyoursecretmarriagetoRachel"Youwanther!Phoebe:No!(Ross’sphonerings)Ross:(answeringit)Uhoh,savedbythebell(isprettymuchtheworseoneyoucangetMonica:Phoebethat’scrazy!Joey:Ican’tbelieveshewouldsaythattooyouRachel:Yeahhoneyyoudon’tbelieveherdoyouPhoebe:Idon’tshesaidy’knowthatI’dhavetriplets!ButshealsosaidoneofthemwouldbeblackChandler:Justoutofcuriositydidshetellyouhowyou’regonnagoPhoebe:No,‘causeshedidn’ttellmeIwasgonnadieuntiltheveryendofthesession,andIwasnotgonnawasteawholeanotherhourthere!ImeanI’veonlygotaweekleft,y’knowI’vereallygottastartlivingnow!(SoshepicksupthelatestcopyofCarandDriver(aUSautomagazine),leansback,andstartsreading)Ross:(entering)Heyeveryone!Chandler:Ohhi!Ross:Heyuh,well,today’smyfirstlectureandIkindawantedtotryitoutonyouguys,doyou,doyoumind(Theypausetothinkaboutit)All:Ohthat’dbegreatSure!Ross:(hestartsreadingdirectlyfromhiscardswordforwordveryquietly)"TherearethreeprimarytheoriesconcerningsedimentflowrateEachofthesetheoriescanbefurthersubcategorizedintotwodistinct…"Phoebe:Oh,thisisitThiswhat’sgonnakillmeRoss:(continuing)"…subcategoriesThefirstofthesesubcategoriesis…"Joey:(interruptinghim)UhRoss!Arethereuh,aretherenakedchicksonthatpieceofpaperRoss:No!WhyJoey:Well,I’vejustneverseenaguystaresohardatapieceofpaperthatdidn’thavenakedchicksonitRoss:Ohh!Okay!Okay(Resumesreadingwordforwordfromthecard)"Therearethree(pausesandlooksatJoey)primarytheoriesconcerningsedimentflowrate(PausesanddartshiseyesbetweenChandlerandRachel)(Rachelstartslaughing)Eachofthesetheories(glancesatPhoebe)canbefurthersubcategorized(glancesatChandler)into…"Chandler:Whydon’tyouopenwithajokeRoss:OpenwithajokeIt’sauniversity,notacomedyclub!Chandler:Waitaminute,holdthephone!You’renottalkingaboutChucklesUniversity!Ross:(getsup)Okay!All:Ohh!We’rekidding!Oh,we’rekidding!Rachel:Ross,heyyouknowwhatmightmakeitlessboringRoss:Thankyou!Rachel:Someuh,somevisualaidesJoey:Ohoohooh!Y’knowwhat’sagoodvisualaideRoss:Pleasedon’tsaynakedchicksJoey:Whynot!Ross:IIIdon’tevenknowwhyIbothertotalktoyouguysaboutitY’knowwhatI’mjustgonnadoitonmyownwithnonakedchicksChandler:That’sthewayIdidit‘tilIwasScene:ChandlerandJoey's,JoeyisplayingthatstringgamewiththetwohandsandtheweirdcrossingpatternsasChandlerenterswiththemailChandler:HeyJoey:Hey!AnygoodmailChandler:Yes,yougotsomethingfromtheScreenActor’sGuildJoey:Ooh,it’sprobablyaresidualcheck,heycanyouopenitforme,I’mkinda…Chandler:(opensandreadsit)"Benefitslapsed"Joey:Hmmthat’sweirdIdon’trememberbeinginamovecalledbenefitslapsedChandler:Okay,it’snotacheckThey’resayingyourhealthinsuranceexpiredbecause,youdidn’tworkenoughlastyearJoey:Letmeseethat!Chandler:AllrightJoey:(readsit)Oh,Ican’tbelievethis!Thissucks!WhenIhadinsuranceIcouldgethitbyabusorcatchonfire,y’knowAnditwouldn’tmatterNowIgottabecareful!Chandler:I’msorryman,there’sneveragoodtimeto(pauses)stopcatchingonfireJoey:Allrightwell,IguessIgottagogetajobI’mgonnagoseemyagentChandler:Okay,makesureyoulookbothwaysbeforeyoucrossthestreetJoey:(mockshim,inawhineyvoice)…lookbothwaysbeforeyoucrossthestreet(Turnsandwalksheadlongintothecloseddoor)Scene:MonicaandRachel's,PhoebeenterstofindRachelstillpackingPhoebe:Hey!Rachel:HeyPheebs,you’restillalive!HowareyoudoingPhoebe:Ugh,it’ssoexhaustingwaitingfordeathOhh,bytheway,doyouthinkyoucould(Groans,hacks,andthenfreezeswithhereyesopenandhertonguehangingout)Rachel:Pheebs,whatwhatareyoudoingPhoebe:Iwaspreparingyouformydidn’tyouthinkIwasdeadDidthatnotcomeoffRachel:Ohyeah,scaredthehelloutofmeIthoughtwe’dlostyouforeverPheebs,youliedownPhoebe:Yeah,thanksAndlisten,canyoudomeafavorCouldyoujustumm,wakemeupinacouplehours,y’knowifyoucan(PhoebegoesandliesdownasRachelopensthedrawerMonicahidthecandlesticksinandasMonicawalksoutofherroom)Rachel:Monica!Monica:Hmm(Rachelholdsupthecandlesticks)Rachel:DiddidyoutakethesebackMonica:Nono,IIjust,IlikedthemsomuchthatIwentoutandboughtsomeformyselfRachel:Ohyeah,they’rereallygreat!Aren’ttheyMonica:Ilovedthem!Rachel:Yeah(Monicawalksaway)Nicetry!(Rachelputstheminabox)Ross:(entering)Hello!Monica:Hey!Rachel:Hey!Monica:How’dthelecturegoRoss:Itwentgreat!AndIdidn’tneedanyjokesornakedchickseither!Rachel:Wow,that’sgreatRoss,I’msorryweweren’tmoresupportivebeforeRoss:IknewallIhadtodowasletthematerialspeakforitselfEveryone’sall,"Rossyouhavetobefunnyandsexy"Well,Iprovedthemwrong!Andnow,I’mgonnapassthenewsontoJoeyandChandlerMonica:Thatyou’renotfunnyorsexyRoss:That’sright!Scene:EstelleLeonardTheatricalAgency,JoeyistheretoseehisagentJoey:(entering)HeyEstelle,listen…Estelle:Well!Well!Well!JoeyTribbiani!SoyoucamebackhuhTheythinktheycandobetterbuttheyallcomecrawlingbacktoEstelle!Joey:Whatareyoutalkin’aboutIneverleftyou!You’vealwaysbeenmyagent!Estelle:Really!Joey:Yeah!Estelle:Ohwell,noharm,nofoulJoey:Estelle,yougottagetmesomeworkIIlostmyhealthinsuranceEstelle:Allright,firstthingwegottado,damagecontrolJoey:WhyEstelle:Well,Ithinkuhh,someoneouttheremayhavebeenbadmouthingyouallovertownJoey:Bastard!Scene:ChandlerandJoey's,ChandlerenterstofindJoeylyinginthefetuspositiononthefloorChandler:Hey!Joey:(inobviouspain)Hey!SoEstellelinedupabunchofauditionsformetomorrowandI’llhavemyhealthinsurancebackinnotimeChandler:That’sgreat,butshouldn’tyoubeonthetoiletrightnowJoey:What!Chandler:What’swrongwithyouJoey:Nothing!Well,IIgotthisblindingpaininmystomachwhenIwasliftingweightsbefore,thenIuhpassedoutanduh,haven’tbeenabletostandupsinceButum,Idon’tthinkit’sanythingseriousChandler:ThissoundslikeaherniaYouhavetoyouyougotothedoctor!Joey:Noway!‘Kaylook,ifIhavetogotothedoctorforanythingit’sgonnabeforthisthingstickingoutofmystomach!(RollsoverandshowsChandler)Chandler:That’saherniaJoey:WhydidIhavetostartworkingoutagain(Looksattheweightshewasusing)Damnyous!Scene:aNYUlecturehall,RachelandMonicaarearrivingtotalktoRossafterthelecture,butarethereearlyRachel:Well,we’realittleearly,thelecturedoesn’tendforminutesMonica:Yeah,buty’knowwecouldsneakinandwatchRachel:Yeah,wecouldOhheylook!There’ssomeKappaKappaDeltas!IwasaKappa(tothem)Heysisters!(Theyignoreher)(ToMonica)Wow,wereallyarebitches(TheyenterthelecturehalltofindRossspeakinginanEnglishaccentforsomeunknownreason)Ross:(totheclass)Right!SowhenRigbygothissamplesbackfromthelaboratoryhemadeastartlingdiscovery!Whathebelievedtobeigneous,wasinfactsedimentaryImaginehisconsternationwhen(seesMonicaandRachel)OhbloodyhellCommercialBreakScene:aNYUlecturehall,thesceneiscontinuedfromearlier,onlyRosshasdismissedtheclassandisnowtalkingtoMonicaandRachelMonica:Whatthehellareyoudoing!Ross:Look,Iwasnervous!YouguyshadmeallworriedIwasgoingtobeboring!IgotupthereandtheywerealllikestaringatmeIopenedmymouthandthisBritishaccentjustcameoutRachel:Yeah,andnotaverygoodoneRoss:Willyouwillyouplease(Anotherprofessorwalksdownfromthebackofthelecturehall)TheProfessor:DrGeller,KurtRathman,I’maprofessorinthepaleontologydepartmenthereRoss:OhTheProfessor:DoyouhaveamomenttotalkaboutyourlectureRoss:(inhisBritishaccent)I’msorry,I’vegotplanswithmysisterMonica:(inanIrishaccent)MonicaGellerrr(Sherollsher‘R’)Ross:(inaccent)Right,willyouexcuseusforonemoment(TakesMonicaaside)(Inhisnormalvoice)WhatareyoudoingMonica:(normalvoice)Oh,youcanhaveanaccentandIcan’t!(Toanexitingstudentinaccent)Top‘Othemorningtoyaladdies!Ross:Justpleasestop!(TheyturnbacktoRachelandProfessorRathman)Rachel:(inanIndianaccent)Yes,yes,Bombayisbery,berynicetimeofyearScene:CentralPerk,ChandlerisreadingonthecouchwhileJoey,stillsufferingfromhishernia,isreturningwithcoffeeforthembothAfteraseriesofgruntsandgroanshemanagestopainfullywalkbackfromthecounter,sitdown,andslideChandlerhiscoffeeChandler:Hey,willyougrabmeacruller(Joeystartstogroanandgetup)Sitdown!Willyougotothehospital!Joey:Dude!Herniaoperationscostlike,alotprobablyBesidesit’sgettingdarkerandmorepainful,thatmeansit’shealingChandler:IwillloanyouthemoneyJustgotothehospitalandlet’sjustgetthatthing…pushedbackinJoey:Thankyou,butitwouldtakemeforevertopayyouthatmoneybackandIdon’twantthathangingovermyheadOkayBesides,assoonasmyinsurancekicksinIcangetallthefreeoperationsIwant!Yeah,I’mthinkingI’llprobablystartwiththatlasereyesurgerytoo(Phoebeenters)Phoebe:Hey!Chandler:HeyJoey:Hey!Phoebe:What’sgoingonChandler:OhJoey’sgotareallybadhernia,butthat’snothingalittlelasereyesurgerywon’tfix!Joey:Look,I’mtellingyouifIputmyhandonmystomachrighthere(Heputshishanddownhispants,likeAlBundyonMarried…WithChildrenalwaysusedtodo)itdoesn’thurtthatbadPhoebe:Hey!Maybeyou’lldie!Joey:Sure,nowI’mscaredPhoebe:No,wecangotogether!Justdon’twaittoolongthough,okay‘CauseI’mouttaheresometimebeforeFridayJoey:Yeah,butIdon’twannadie!Phoebe:Nono,it’llbefun!Wecancomebackandwecanhaunttheseguys!Scene:MonicaandRachel's,MonicaandRachelarehavingatugofwaroverthedisputedcandlesticksMonica:Gimme‘em!Rachel:No!Theyaremine!Monica:Youstolethemfromme!Rachel:Youstolethemfromme!!Monica:Gimmethem!(Withonelastmightytugthecombatantslosetheirgripandsplit,eachholdingonecandlestick)Monica:YoujustwannaeachtakeoneRachel:YeahthatseemsfairWeneverusethemRoss:(entering)Look,Ireallyneedsomehelp,okayWhyWhydidIhavetospeakinaBritishaccent!WhatdoIdoRachel:Well…Monica:Whydon’tyouphaseitoutYeah,fadetheaccentoutandpeoplewillthinkyou’re,y’know,thatyou’readjustingtolifeinAmericaRachel:Yeah,Imean,comeonRoss,noonewillevennoticeImeanthey’reprobablynotevenlistening!Ross:They’renotlisteningtoomeRachel:Ofcoursethey’relisteningtoyou!EverybodylistenstoyouRoss:MonicayoureallythinkIshouldtrythisphasingoutthingMonica:IthinkyoulookfineScene:CastingDirector#’soffice,JoeyisonhisfirstauditionHispartnerisanyearoldboyCastingDirector#:Wheneveryou’rereadyJoey:(inagravely,painfulvoice)Okay"Hey,Timmy,I’vegotasurpriseforyou"CastingDirector#:HolditI’msorry,thesurpriseisanewswingset,ifyoucouldplayitalittleless…intenseJoey:Ohyeah,sure,noproblem,I’lljustholdononesecond(Heturnsaroundandputshishandinhispantsandgroansinrelief)(Inarelaxedvoice)"HeyTimmy,I’vegotasurpriseforyou!"CastingDirector#:OhmyGod!!(Joeypullshishandoutandrevertsbacktointensepain)Scene:CastingDirector#’soffice,JoeyisonhissecondauditionThisoneisforPurinaOneDogChow,anactualitemPleasenotethegratuitousproductplacementJoey:Sothat’swhyIfeedmydogPurinaOne!Pickupabagtoday!(Heturns,looksatthebagandrealizeshewon’tbeabletopickitup)CastingDirector#:That’swhereyoupickupthebagJoey:ExactlyCastingDirector#:No,thelineispickabag,soyouneedtopickupthebagJoey:Or,Icouldjustpointtoit!HuhBlah,blah,blah,PurinaOne,pointtoabagtoday(Shejustlooksathim)Ididn’tgetit,didICastingDirector#:NoJoey:Yeah,okay(Leaves)Scene:CastingDirector#’soffice,JoeyisenteringJoey:HiI’mJoeyTribbianiI’mheretoauditionfor(Groans)manCastingDirector#:YoumeandyingmanJoey:Yes!Scene:MonicaandRachel's,MonicaandRachelareplayingphonepranksonRossMonica:Okay,comeon,doitonemoretime!Rachel:ReallyReally!Monica:Yes!Rachel:Okay!(Picksupthephoneandstartsdialing)(InanIrishaccent)"HelloRoss,thisisDrMcNeeleyfromtheFakeAccentUniversity,we’dlikeyoutocomeonboardwithusfulltime!(Hangsup)Phoebe:(entering)Hey!Rachel:Hey!Phoebe:Listentothis!Myreadingwaswrong,I’mnotgoingdie!Rachel:Really!HowdoyouknowPhoebe:Becausemypsychicisdead!Shemust’vereadthecardswrong!Rachel:Oh,I’msorryPhoebe:Eh,betterherthanme!Hey,let’sbakecookies!Scene:SilvercupStudios,JoeyhaswonthepartofdyingmanandisnowabletoplaytherolehewasinjuredforChandlerishelpingtocarryhiminChandler:Listen,I’mreallygladyougotthepartJoey:(barelyaudiblethroughthepain)ThankyouChandler:ButareyousureyoucandothisJoey:Yeah!Andhey,thanksforcomingwithmeAndthanksagainforhelpingmetakeashower(Chandlerstepsawayquickly)Chandler:Now,isthatnevertalkingaboutitagain!Joey:(tothedirector)Hiya!TheDirector:HeyJoey,we’rereadyforya!(Joeystumblesover)Joey,thisisAlexhe’sgoingtobeplayingyoursonJoey:HiAlex!(tothedirector)Anduh,asyoucanseemyhandsarenotinmypants(Holdsthembothup)TheDirector:Okay(toAlex)Allrightuh,AlexnowwhenJoeysayshisline,"TakegoodcareofyourMommason,"that’syourcuetocryGotit(Alexnodsyes)Allright,let’sdothis(Joeyliesdownonthegurney)ACrewMember:(withthatboardthingy)Scene,takeTheDirector:AndAction!Joey:"TakecouldcareofyourMommason"(Alexjustlooksathimandthedirectormotionsforhimtocontinuesohetriesitagain)"TakecouldcareofyourMommason"(Alexdoesnothing)"Comeonson!YourMomma’sgoodpeople!"TheDirector:Cut!Alex,rememberyou’resupposedtocryCanyoucryforusthistimeAlex:OkayTheDirector:Allright,fromthetopACrewMember:Scene,takeTimelapseACrewMember:Takeisup!TheDirector:Allright!Let’strythisagain!YoureadyJoeJoey:Ah,justonethingumm,isitallrightwithyouifI,ifIscreamrightupuntilyousayactionTheDirector:UhsureJoey:Okay(Startsscreaming)TheDirector:Action!Joey:(hestopsscreamingataction)"TakegoodcareofyourMommason"(AgainAlexdoesnothing)TheDirector:Cut!!!!!!!!!!(Joeystartsscreamingagain)(Chandlerdecidestohelpout)Chandler:I’msorry!HeyheyJoe,whydon’tyouuh,liftupyourshirt(Hedoes)Takealookatthiskiddo(Alexfinallystartscrying)Wehaveacryingchild!Rollthedamncameras!Scene:RossandRachel’sapartment,RachelisunpackingasthephoneringsRachel:(answeringit)HelloRussell:(Ross’sdivorcelawyer)Hello,isRossthereRachel:Uhno,he’snotCanItakeamessageRussell:Yes,thisRussell,Ross’sdivorcelawyer,justtellhimthatsinceIhaven’theardfromhim,Iassumehe’sdecidedtogivethemarriageatryRachel:RossgotmarriedagainNooooooo!!!!!!!!!Scene:aNYUlecturehall,RossistryingtophaseouthisaccentRoss:(inhishead)Allright,keepgoingWearephasingtheaccentout,phasingitoutSowithoutoutretestingtheresultsinthelaboratory(pronouncedtheBritishway)theteamwouldneverhaveidentified(British)theinitialerrorsintheircarbondatinganalysis(British)Werethereanyquestionsatthispoint(Onestudentraiseshishand)Yes(Pointstohim)AStudent:What’shappeningtoyouraccentRoss:(British)ComeagainWhat’swhat’sthisnonsense(Giggles)(American)Allright,I’mI’mnotEnglishI’mfromLongIslandIwasreallynervousandtheaccentjustuh,justcameoutI’msorrySo,ifwecouldjustgetbacktothelectureUmm,werethereanyquestions(Everyoneraisestheirhands)Aboutpaleontology(Theyallputtheirhandsdown)Allright,lookIwasjusttryingtomakeagoodfirstimpressionObviously,IscrewedupButwhatyouguysthinkofmeisreallyimportantbecauseI’mI’mhopingtogetapermanentjobhereSoifyoujustgivemeanotherchancetomakeagoodimpression…(AtthismomentRachelburststhroughthedoorNeedlesstosay,she’snotinthebestofmoodshavingjustfoundoutRoss’sdirtylittlesecret)Rachel:Ross!!Areyoucrazy!Iamstillyourwife!!What,wereyoujustnevergonnatellme!!Whatthehelliswrongwithyou!!!!Ugh,Icouldjustkillyou!!!!Ross:(intheaccentagain)Well,helloRachel!EndingCreditsScene:ChandlerandJoey's,Joeyisholdingafootballhelmetandapparently,inaratherdisgustingscene,JoeywantsPhoebetobeathimsenseless(Luckilyitisn’talongtrip)Becausehe’smadeamiraculousrecoveryfromhisherniaandwantstotakeadvantageofallthosefreesurgerieshecangetnowsincehe’sreestablishedhishealthinsurancePhoebe:HaveyoureallydonethisbeforeJoey:Yeah!Yeah!Yeah!Youjusttakeabig,bigswingNow,don’tholdback(Hedonshisprotectivehelmet(Why,Ihavenoclue)andPhoebepicksupawoodenbaseballbatandstartstoswingasChandlerandMonicaenter)Phoebe:Hey!Joey:Heyheyhey!Chandler:WhatareyoudoingPhoebe:We’rejustcelebratingthatJoeygothishealthinsurancebackChandler:Oh,allright(Decidedthattheyarelessthanhumanaswell,ChandlerpicksupagolfclubandMonicaafryingpan,tojoininonthefunofbeatingtheirgoodfriendtowithinaninchofhislife!)End乔伊没买保险好吧,这些厨房用品中那些是我的这个开瓶器还有还有就是它是带磁性的!看看这个!真是太不可思议了,你明白吗你要搬来跟我住了并且带着那个我没有的东西就象嗯,在某种程度上你你成全了我的厨房什么!你完善了我的厨房,好伙伴!罗斯,我知道你想的是什么什么就是她要搬来和你一起住了并且她会再次爱上你而当那时她发现你们已经结婚了她会高兴的,懂吗你你真可耻噢上帝呀!我我明白这是怎么一回事了你爱上瑞秋了!什么!!当然咯!这太合理了!我是说你你被她迷住了就是这样罗斯,你要对瑞秋怎么样罗斯,你你为什么要搬去和瑞秋住你什么时候才会向瑞秋坦白你们那秘密的婚约!你要她!不!啊噢,电话铃救了你你好嘿瑞秋,这些烛台不是我的吗不不,这是我买的噢!对,我忘了你是个骗子不不不,那太好了!我会在周一到那儿的,再次谢谢你!好的呃那是大学古生物系的头儿(学校是)NYU(纽约大学)哇奥!他说了什么还记得我去年发表的那篇关于沉积物流动率的论文吗他们喜欢对,有谁不呢!我知道!总之,他们请我去做客席讲师我是说这是临时的,不过呢,如果他们喜欢我的话那就可能会变成一份全职工作了想想信箱上的大写(字母)瞧起来会有多棒盖勒教授对,教授及夫人及夫人!噢!对呀,你知道你和罗斯还结着婚呢什么!开个玩笑噢!噢上帝!救你一命嘿!嗨!噢,怎么了好吧,你认识那个我看过的通灵者吗对呀她说我这个礼拜会死于是对此我就有点状态不佳什么!对,我知道你们几个不太了解通灵术但这可是你能得到的最糟的结果了菲比这太疯狂了我不能相信她会对你说那些东西是啊亲爱的,你不相信她,不是吗我不你知道她说过我会生个三胞胎的!但她也说过其中一个是黑人只是出于好奇,她有没有说你会怎么死没有,因为她不到最后关头也不会告诉我我会死因此从现在开始我不会再浪费任何一个小时了!我是说我只有一个礼拜了,知道吗我真是该开始好好活了!嘿各位!噢嗨!嘿,今天是我的第一堂课,我有点想先给你们讲讲试试你们,你们介意吗噢那太好了,当然可以!关于沉积物的流动率有三种主要理论其中每一种又能被进一步分成两种截然不同的噢就是它了就是它会杀了我子理论其中第一个子理论是噢罗斯!那张纸上有有脱光的女孩儿吗没有!为什么(会有)好吧,我可从没见过一个人那么认真的盯着一张纸,而那纸上却没有脱光的女孩儿噢!好吧好吧有三种主要的理论关于沉积物的流动率其中每一种又能被进一步分成你为什么不用一个笑话来开场呢以笑话开场那可是大学,不是什么喜剧俱乐部!等一等,别挂电话!你不是在说咯咯笑的大学呀!够了!噢!我们是开玩笑的,开个玩笑嘛!罗斯,想知道什么能让你的课不那么无聊吗非常感谢!某种呃,某种实际(看的见)的帮助噢噢噢!你知道什么是又好又看的见的帮助吗请别说是脱光的女孩儿为什么不呢我我我真搞不懂干嘛要费事来跟你们这几个讲这些东西知道吗我就要以我自己的方式来干,用不着脱光的女孩儿我岁之前也一直是那么做的嘿嘿有什么好消息吗有,有封演员行会给你的信噢,说不定是张片酬支票你能帮我拆开吗,我有点保险失效真是太奇怪了我不记得我演过一部叫"保险失效"的电影呀好吧,这不是支票信上说由于你去年工作的不够,你的医疗保险过期了让我看看!好的噢,真是难以置信!这太不爽了!知道吗有保险时我可以被车撞或是被火烧而没有关系而现在我得小心点了!我很抱歉,日子将变得不爽当你要避免被火烧的时候的确,我想我得找个活儿干了,我要去见我的经理人好的,过马路时记住先往左右看看过马路时先往左右看看嘿!嘿菲比你还活着!感觉怎么样呃,等死真是累人呀噢,顺便说一下,你能不能菲比,你你在干什么我正准备让你成为我的难道你不认为我死了吗难道这没有发生吗噢是的,可怕的地狱放弃了我,我想我们要永远失去你了菲比,躺下来好的,谢谢听着,你能帮我个忙吗你能不能嗯,两个小时后叫醒我,如果你能的话莫妮卡!嗯你把这些拿回去了不不,我只是太喜欢它们了,所以我自己出去买了一对噢对,它们真是太漂亮了!不是吗我爱它们!对,干得不错!你好!嘿!嘿!课讲得怎么样太棒了!而且我也没讲什么笑话或是脱光的女孩儿!Wow,太棒了罗斯我很遗憾我们之前不太支持你我知道我该做的就是让它顺其自然大家都认为"罗斯你该有趣些性感些"好,我证明他们错了!现在,我要把这个消息告诉乔伊和钱德去了是你既不有趣也不性感的消息吗非常正确!嘿艾丝苔拉,听我说瞧瞧瞧!乔伊崔比昂尼那么你回来了别人都以为他们能够做得更好,但最后他们都回到艾丝苔拉的身边来了!你在说什么呀我从没离开过你!你一直是我的经理人!真的!对!噢好吧,没恶意的艾丝苔拉,你得给我找个活儿干,我我失去了我的健康保险好吧首先我们要做的事是,控制损失为什么是啊,我想嗯,有些人在城里给你到处造谣呢混蛋!嘿!嘿!明天艾丝苔拉给我安排了一大堆试镜我马上就又会有医疗保险了这太好了,但你是不是该马上去一下厕所什么你哪里不舒服没哪里!好吧,刚才我我举重时肚子突然疼得不得了然后我呃就晕过去了呃之后就站不起来了但是,我认为这没有什么大不了的看上去象是疝气,你得,你你得去看医生!没门儿!瞧着,要是我去医生那儿看些什么病这东西就得从我的肚子里出来!那是疝气为什么我又得开始工作了呢该死的哑铃!欧,我们来得早了点,分钟内课还不会结束对,但你知道我们可以偷偷溜进去瞧瞧对,我们可以嘿瞧啊!那有几个KappaKappaDelta的会员!我也是个会员呢嘿姐妹们!哇喔,我们真是犯贱对!当Rigby从实验室取回他的样品时他有了一个令人震惊的发现!那些他原以为是火成岩的东西,其实是沉积岩想象一下当时他有多么的震惊吧噢该死!你到底在干些什么呀!瞧,我有点紧张!你们几个让我担心我的课会很无聊我站在讲台上时学生们都盯着我看我一张嘴就带上了英国腔对,而且还不那么正宗请你请你让一让好吗盖勒教授,我叫科特拉什曼我是古生物系的教授能赏光聊聊你的课吗抱歉,我和我的妹妹有事要办莫妮卡盖勒对,您不介意我们俩单独谈一会儿吧你说什么呢噢,就你能有口音而我不能上午女士们最棒请别这样了!对对孟买在一年里的这个时候很漂亮嘿,能帮我带个煎饼来吗坐下!你要不要去医院了伙计!疝气手术可能要花不少的钱而且现在越来越让我疼得眼发花了这意味着它正在好转我会借给你钱的只要你去趟医院,只是把那玩意儿推推回去谢谢,但这得让我还你一辈子的钱我不想让这成天让我不安,好吗而且,一旦我的保险恢复了,我就能免费做所有我想做的手术了对呀,我想我可能会以那个激光眼科手术为开端嘿!嘿出什么事了乔伊得了非常严重的疝气,但那不是一个小小的激光眼科手术能治好的!瞧,我得告诉你,如果我把我的手放在我肚子的这个部位它就不那么疼了嘿!你可能会死的!当然,现在我开始害怕了不,我们可以一块儿去死的!就是别屏的太久,好吗因为我会在礼拜五前的某个时候翘掉对呀,但我不想死!不不,那会很好玩儿的!我们在这里还魂来吓唬他们!给我!不!那是我的!是你从我这里偷去的!是你偷的!!给我!!你想每人拿一个吗是啊这看来挺公平的我们从未用过它们听着,我确实需要些帮助,好吗为什么为什么我要带着英国腔说话!我都干了些什么呀为什么你不能让它消失呢对,让那口音慢慢淡化于是人们就会认为你,你知道的,你正在适应在美国生活对呀,我是说,就这么干吧,没人会注意的我是说有可能他们都不在听你讲课!他们不在听我讲课他们当然在听你讲课!人人都在听呢莫妮卡,你是否真的认为我该试试这个淡化的玩意儿我认为你气色很好准备好了开始嘿,添米,我有个惊喜给你打住了抱歉这个惊喜是个新的秋千组合,你能否稍微带些热情来演呢噢对,当然,没问题我会的稍等一会儿嘿添米我有个惊喜给你噢上帝呀这就是为什么我给我的狗喂普雷纳一号的原因今天就买一包吧!你得从那儿拿起那包(狗食)的确对,底线是你得拿起来,所以你得拿起那包(狗食)或者说,我可以只是指指他嗯无聊无聊无聊普雷纳一号就指一包吧我没合格,是吧是的嗨,我是乔伊崔比昂尼,我来试镜,演个男人你是说快死的男人吧对呀!好吧,来,再干一次!真的真的真的你好罗斯我是假口音大学的麦克娜丽教授我们希望你来我们这里工作,全职的!嘿!嘿!听着我的那个通灵预测错了,我不会死了!真的!你怎么知道的因为我的通灵师死了她一定是解错了牌噢,我很抱歉呃,她死总比我死好嘿,我们来烘曲奇饼吧!听这,我很高兴你得到这个角色谢谢但你肯定你干得了吗当然而且我还得谢谢你来陪我并再次感谢你帮我洗澡够了,别再提这事了你好嘿乔伊,就等你了乔伊,这是阿历克斯,他将扮演你的儿子你好阿历克斯对了,你可看见了,我的手可没在裤衩里哟没有好了,阿历克斯当乔伊说他的那句台词儿子你要好好照顾你妈妈时,就到你哭的时候了懂了吗好吧,我们干吧场景,第一镜开拍儿子你要好好照顾你的妈妈哭呀儿子!你妈可是个好人呀停阿历克斯,记住你是要哭的,这次你能哭给大家看吗可以好,从头再来场景,第镜第镜开始好吧!让我们再试试!准备好了吗乔伊嗯,还有间事你是否介意如果我如果我在你说开拍前一直大喊嗯没问题开拍儿子你要好好照顾你的妈妈停!!!!!!我很抱歉嘿嘿乔伊你为什么不嗯把你的衬衫撩起来瞧瞧这位老兄这有个哭包了!让该死的摄影机转起来你好你好,罗斯在吗不,他不在我能给他带个信吗可以,我叫罗塞尔,是罗斯的离婚律师告诉他由于最近没有他的消息,我猜他是否不准备离婚了罗斯又结婚了不!!!!!!!!好吧,继续,我们要让口音慢慢淡化,让它消掉所以在没有重测实验室的结果的前提下这组(人员)是不会鉴别出他们最初所做的碳同位素年代分析中的错误对此有什么疑问吗是的你的口音怎么了又来了这这都哪儿跟哪儿呀好吧,我我不是英国人我出生在长岛我真的很紧张,这口音就这么就这么冒出来了对不起了那么,我们能否回到正题上来呢嗯还有什么问题吗关于古生物学的好吧,瞧我只是为了留下一个好的第一印象很明显我搞砸了但你们大家对我的看法真的很重要因为我我想在这得到份长久的工作所以如果你们再给我个机会来给你们留下个好印象的话罗斯!!你疯了吗!我还是你的老婆!!怎么了,你准备永远不告诉我吗!!你到底犯的哪门子傻!!!!噢我真想宰了你你好瑞秋你以前真这么干过吗对对对只要把胳膊挥的大大一点,就先在别犹豫嘿!嘿!你们在干什么我们在庆祝乔伊的医疗保险失而复得噢好
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604 The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance

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