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首页 605 The One With Joey’s Porsche

605 The One With Joey’s Porsche.doc

605 The One With Joey’s Porsche

nkliuqi
2018-09-08 0人阅读 举报 0 0 暂无简介

简介:本文档为《605 The One With Joey’s Porschedoc》,可适用于文学艺术领域

TheOneWithJoey’sPorscheScene:MonicaandRachel's,thegangisthereexceptforRachelandRoss,whobothcomestorminginRachelisstillgoingoffaboutRoss’ssecretmarriageRachel:Icannotbelievethatyoudidn’ttellmethatwearestillmarried!!Ross:LookIwasgoingtotellyou!Rachel:When!Afterthebirthofourfirstsecretchild!(ToAll)Rossdidn’tgettheannulmentwearestillmarriedChandler:WhatMonica:You’rekidding!Phoebe:(overdoingit)OhmyGod!!Monica:Ross!Ross:Okay,maybeitwasn’tmybestdecisionButIjustcouldn’tfaceanotherfailedmarriageChandler:Okay,letmejustjumpinandask,atwhatpointdidyouthinkthiswasasuccessfulmarriageRoss:Rach,comeon,ifyouthinkaboutit,it’sactuallykindafunny(Helaughs,andhelaughsalone)Okay,maybeit’sbestnottothinkaboutitPhoebe:Okay,thisisinexcusableIamshockedtomyverycore!Ross:Phoebe,ItoldheryoualreadyknewPhoebe:AnotherlieYouhaveasickness!Chandler:Ross,justformyownpieceofmind,you’renotmarriedtoanymoreofusareyaOpeningCreditsScene:CentralPerk,JoeyandMonicaareatthecountergettingsomemorecoffeeJoey:Oh!Hey,somebodylefttheirkeysbandTheappleofmyeyeRoss:Okay,Igotusacourtdatefortomorrowat:andIpickedupalltheformsI’lltakecareofeverythingRachel:Wellsure,ifyousayyou’regonnatakecareofeverythingIhavenoreasontodoubtyouGivemethoseforms!(Grabsthemfromhim)Allright,nowI’mgonnadothismywayandIdon’twanttohearapeepoutofyou!Ross:OkayRach,but…Rachel:Op!You’repeeping!(Rossgruntssomethingandhandsherthepenhewastryingtohandher)Rachel:Ross!Y’knowwhat,IjustgotwhyWhydidyoudothis!Ross:LookItoldyou…Rachel:Idon’twannahear"Threefailedmarriages!"Ross:Look,ifyou’dhadtwofailedmarriages,you’dunderstand!Rachel:Well,y’knowwhatThankstoyouI’mhalfwaythere!Ugh!Oh!Iamsomad!Ross,Idon’tthinkIhaveeverbeenthisangry!Ross:WhataboutthetimeIsaidwewereonabreakRachel:Ugh!(Staresathim)Scene:MonicaandRachel's,thenextday,Chandler,Monica,andPhoebearebabysittingthetripletsTheyeachhaveonebabyMonica:Pheebs,how’sitgoingPhoebe:(rapidly)I’mdoingokayIthinkit’sgoingwellDoyouthinkthey’rehavingfunAmItalkingtofastMonica:Nope,soundlikemePheebs,it’sgoinggreatLookatChandlerwithlittlebabygirlChandlerChandler:LittlebabygirlChandler,whereIhaveheardthatbeforeOhright,CoachRuben(TriestogethertodrinkalittlemorefromthebottlewhenhesuddenlysmellssomethingIt’stimesliketheseI’mgladSmellOVisionhasn’tbeeninvented)DoyouknowwhatPheebsWhenyou’redoneoverthere,wekindahaveasituationoverheretoo(Phoebeischanginghers)Phoebe:Nauh,no,weareallresponsibleforourownbabiesChandler:Seethat’swhereIthinkthatyou’rewrongWe’vebeenplayingthesebabiesmanformanweshouldreallybeplayingazonedefenseMonica:WhatdoyoumeanChandler:IjustthinkthatthingswouldgoalotsmootherifweeachhaveourownzonePhoebe,youcanbeinchargeofwipingAndy’knowMon,youcanbeinchargeofdiaperingandIcanbeinchargeoflookinghowcutetheyarewhentheyputtheirhandsaround…(Hedegradesintobabytalk,buthemeanswhentheygrabhisfinger)Phoebe:Thatsoundsreallygreat,butmaybeyoushouldbeinchargeofwipingChandler:Okay,I’marookieIshouldnotbeintheendzoneTimelapse,theyhavesetupalittleassemblylinefordiaperchangesPhoebewipes,Chandleraddsthepowder,begrudgingly,andMonicaputsthediaperonMonica:Thisissogreat!ThisisexactlyhowwesettheplatesattherestaurantPhoebe:Yeah(Checkingthefinaldiaper)WellthisisnotwhatIorderedJoey:(entering)Heyguys!Chandler:Hey!Phoebe:Hey!Joey:Heybabies!Oh,I’mhavingthebestmorningThatuh,thatPorscheI’vegotthekeystoo,stillthere!Chandler:Shocking!SinceyoustillhavethekeysJoey:YoushouldseethetreatmentIgetwhenI’mwiththatcar!Peoplearefriendlytheytheywannatalk,andnotjustaboutthecar!OneguygavemeadviceaboutmyequityinvestmentsChandler:WhatequityinvestmentsJoey:TheonesthatgotmethePorsche!Willyoukeepup!(Chandlerwipeshisforeheadwithababywipe,thatmighthavebeenusedHedropsitdisgustedly)ButIfigured,ififpeoplekeepseeingmejuststandingthere,they’regonnastarttothinkthatIdon’townitSoIfiguredI’llwashitRightMonica,yougotabucketandsomesoapIcanborrowMonica:Ohyeah,IgotsoapandspongesandragsandCarnubawaxandpolishingcompoundChandler:Youdon’tevenhaveacar!Monica:IknowButumm,onetimetherewasthisreallydirtycarinfrontofthebuilding,soIwasheditChandler:AndMonica:AndsixothersChandler:ThereyouareScene:ThePorsche,JoeyisfinishingupwashingthecarandistalkingtoaguyaboutthecarJoey:Yeah,shetopsoutatGuy#:Wow!Joey:Andthat’sjustinthecityIgetheruptowhenItakeherupstateGuy#:Really!YougotaplaceupstateJoey:Sure!Guy#:Well,I’llseeyoulaterJoey:Okay,takeiteasyThePorscheOwner:Hey!That’smycarJoey:ReallyOhuh,ohjustgivemefivemoreminuteswithitThePorscheOwner:WhatwhatareyoudoingJoey:OhIIuh,foundthekeysandnowI’mjustpolishingherupThePorscheOwner:Butit’smycar!Joey:Yeah,butit’smywaxThePorscheOwner:Listen,IIIdon’tcometothiscitymuchsoIdon’tknowifyou’recrazyorthisissomekindofstreettheater,butcouldIhavemykeysJoey:SureHere(Hehandsthemover)I’lluh,saveyourparkingspotThePorscheOwner:I’mnotcomingbackJoey:WhynotThePorscheOwner:IliveupstateJoey:Yeah,sodidI(Theguygetsinanddrivesoff)Scene:MonicaandRachel's,thetripletsareallintheircribasMonicaandPhoebewatchthemPhoebe:Idon’tknowwhyIwassonervousaboutthisAndIdon’tknowwhyFrankandAlicearealwayscomplainingThisissoeasyMonica:Yeah,twohours,alifetimethat’sthesameChandler:(entering)Checkitout!Checkitout!Whenthebabieswakeup,theycanmeetKrog!(HeholdsupthisXenalikewarrioractionfigure)Monica:Chandler,whatareyoudoingThatthingcanputsomeone’seyeout!Chandler:Hecandomorethanthat!Hecandestroytheuniverse!Phoebe:NoChandler,theycanswallowoneofthoselittleparts!Andalso,lookathissmootharea,that’sjustgonnamessthemupChandler:They’renotgonnaswallowanything,youguysarebeingwayoverprotectiveWhenIwasakid,mymomusedtojustthrowmeintoapileofbrokenglass!Phoebe:What!Chandler:Glass,sand,whatever(WalksoutasMonicaandPhoebeturntocheckonthebabiesagain)Phoebe:Oh,lookatlittleLesliestretchinginhersleepMonica:Ohit’ssocuteIwonderwhatageitiswhenyoustopbeingabletoputbothlegsoveryourheadPhoebe:Oh,IcanstilldothatMonica:Howareyoustillsingle!Chandler:(entering)Allright(Clearsthroat)Ithoughtaboutitandmaybeyou’rerightMaybeKrogisnotasafetoyMonica:GoodWhatmadeyouchangeyourmindChandler:IswallowedthesonicblastergunPhoebe:Howdidthathappen!!Chandler:Well,IwastryingtoprovethatIwasrightY’knowAnditturnsoutIwaswrongAndnowit’slodgedinmythroat(Mimicsacattryingtocoughupahairball)(Hedoesitagain)Monica:Damnit!Y’knowthiswholetimewewereconcentratingonwatchingthebabiesand,andnoonewaswatchingChandler!(Hedoesitagain)Scene:Ajudge’schambers,RachelandRossarefilingtheirannulmentpapersJudge:OkayyoutwoareaskingthecourtforanannulmentRachel:Yesyourhonor,andhereare,areforms,allfilledoutJudge:SobasedonyourpetitionyouareseekinganannulmentonthegroundsthatMrGellerismentallyunstableRoss:Fine,I’mmentallyunstableJudge:AndbasedonthefactthatMrGellerisintravenousdruguserRoss:What!Rachel:Uhyes,heroinandcrackRoss:Crackisn’tevenanintravenousdrug!Rachel:Well,youwouldknowJudge:NowitalsosaysherethatyouliedaboutyoursexualpreferencebeforemarriageRoss:Oh,comeon!Rachel:(startstocry)Ross,please,Ifoundthemagazines!Judge:AndfinallythatyouwereunabletoconsummatethemarriageWell,thatmakessensesinceyou’regayandaddictedtoheroinRoss:Okay,I’msorry,thisisinsane!III’mnotaddictedtoheroin,I’mnotgay,andthereisnoproblemwithmyabilitytoconsummateanything!Look,I’llconsummatethismarriagerighthere,rightnow!Judge:Thatwon’tbenecessaryRoss:Andwhenweweredatingweconsummatedlikebunnies!Rachel:Ugh!Judge:Nowifyouweretwoinvolvedinaseriousrelationship,thatreallycreatesaproblemRachel:Ross!Yourhonor,restassuredrelationshipendedliketwoyearsago!(Tothestenographer)Andcouldyoustrike"Consummatedlikebunnies"fromtherecordJudge:Isthere,anythinginthisrecordthatisactuallytrueRachel:Well,yes,wegotmarriedinVegasanduh,andthenamesIthinkJudge:Well,basedonwhatIheard,youtwocertainlydon’tqualifyforanannulmentIfyoutwodon’twanttobetogetheryou’llhavetofilefordivorceRoss:(standsup)That’sgreat!AreyouhappynowLookwhatyoudidwithyourfunny,funnyform!Rachel:(standsupaswell)What!Me!Whataboutyouandyourconsummatedlikebunniesnonsense!Ross:Andwhat(noticesthestenographerisstilltyping)WhatareyoutypingthatforDidyouhearwhatshesaidWedon’tgettheannulmentDon’ttypethat!What!Stoptyping!(HegoesovertowherethestenographeristypingandintheprocesspushesRacheloutofhisway)Hey!Stoptyping!(He’sstilltyping)Stoptyping!Stoptyping!!Rachel:(tothejudge)Okay,doyousee,doyouseewhatyou’rekeepingmemarriedtoo!Judge:YouneedtogetoutofmychambersRachel:Allrightlookladyhereisthedeal,IcamehereforanannulmentandIamnotleavinghereuntilIgetone!Ross:Yeah!Judge:WouldyouliketospendthenightinjailRachel:Andthankyouforyourtime(Theybothbeatahastyretreat)CommercialBreakScene:MonicaandRachel's,ChandlerisstilldoingthehairballthingasMonicaandPhoebearewatchingthebabiesIcan’tdescribeit,you’llhavetoseeitwhenitcomesoninyourareaJoey:(enteringwearingnothingbutPorscheclothes)SothePorscheguytookhiscarbackChandler:ButyoufoundthekeystohisclothesJoey:NoNo,Ijustuh,IjustlovedthewayitfeelswheneverybodythinksIownaPorscheMonica:AndpeoplewillthinkyouownaPorschebecauseyou’rewearingtheclothesJoey:Ofcourse!Onlyanidiotwouldwearthisstuffifyoudidn’thavethecar!RightChandler:ThatistruePhoebe:Yeah,butonlyageniuswouldswallowasonicblastergunJoey:Oh,I’vebeenthereYeah,IamgonnagodrivemyPorsche(Startstoleave)Monica:Joey,youknowyoudon’tactuallyhaveoneJoey:Comeon!Whatareyoudoing!I’mincharacter!Wouldyoutalktoher!(Stormsout)Chandler:Ahh,IthinkitjustmovedIt’sreallypokingmeMonica:Allright,that’sit,we’regoingtotheemergencyroomPhoebe:What!No,youcan’t,youcan’tleavemeherewiththem!We’rebabysitting!Monica:Thebabiesareasleep,I’msureyou’llbeokayonyourownforawhile!Phoebe:Butyouyoucan’tleavemewiththem!Wewe’reateam!We’replayingazone!They’regonnatripleteamme!Monica:He’sgotsomethingplasticlodgedinhisthroat,we’vegottogotothehospitalPhoebe:Butno,becauseadoctorwon’tbeabletohelphim,it’sjustgonnay’knownaturallypassthroughhissysteminlikesevenyearsChandler:Ithinkthat’sgumPhoebe:I’mprettysureit’sgunChandler:Okay,listenthisreallyhurtsLet’sgoPhoebe:Arealmanwouldn’tjustruntothehospital!(Theydon’tstop)No!Whatwould,whatwouldKrogdo(TheyignoreherandPhoebeisleftalone)Scene:Thestreet,JoeyishangingoutwearinghisPorschegrabJoey:Whyisn’tthatvaletbackwithmyPorschePasserby:Maybebecauseyou’vegotthekeysJoey:(towomenpassinghim)Porsche(RossandRachelapproach,they’restillyellingateachother)Rachel:Thisistotallyyourfault!Ross:Myfault!Youthreatenedthejudge!Rachel:Well,yourippedthepaperoutofthecourtreporter’smachine!!Ross:ThatwastheonlywayIcouldgethimtostoptyping!Joey:Hi!HowaretheGellersRachel:Don’tcallusthat!(Stormsaway)Ross:Thejudgewouldn’tletusgetanannulment!Nowwegottagetadivorce!!DidaPorschthrowuponyou(Walkson)Joey:Hey!It’sPorsche!!(He’srighty’know)Scene:MonicaandRachel's,PhoebeisbeingtripleteamedPhoebe:Metakingcareofyouisnoproblem,huhYouguysfeelsafeRightOkay,I’mgonnatakethatspitbubbleas,"Yeah,Ido!"Okay,afterIgetridofthisdirtydiaperLeslie,I’llsetyouupwithacleanone(Shethrowsitatthegarbagewithoutlooking,misses,andknocksoveravaseandflowers,whichfalltothefloorandbreak)Okay,I’msorryIdidn’tmeantoscareyouIjusthavetocleanthatupOkay‘Causelet’sfaceit,we’reatMonica’s(Shecrawlsover,disposesofthediaper,picksuptheflowers,andthevase)IbrokeitAllrightWell,that’sjustthewaythatgoes(Shethrowsoutboththeflowersandthevase)Okay,good(Sheturnsaroundandonlycountstwobabies)WhyarethereonlytwoofyouWhereisLeslieWell,youcan’tanswer(Shestartslookingforher)LeslieWhereareyouLeslieLeslie,nowwouldbeagoodtimeforyourfirstwords!(SheturnsaroundandfindsthatLesliehasmanagedtocrawlintothebottomdraweroftheTVcabinet)Well,lookatyou!Hey!Youarealittlebitmischievous!Mygosh!(Shepicksherupandnoticesasurpriseiswaitinginthedrawer)Oh,you’realotmischievous!Well,it’lldry(Closesthedrawerwithherfoot)(ToLeslie)Okay,yousitwithyourbrotherandsisternowwhoaren’tthere!(Theybothhavedisappearedaswell)TimeLapse,thebabiesarefinallyasleepGoodforPhoebe!Theonlyproblemis,Monica’sapartmentlookslikeatornado,ahurricane,aswarmoflocusts,fire,brimstone,hail,andgiantmaneating,radioactiveantshavetorntheplaceapartNeedlesstosay,it’smessyenoughtocauseMonicatodieofshockrightawayParentswithsmallchildrenknowwhatI’mtalkingaboutChandler:(entering)Hey!Phoebe:(exhausted)HowdoyoufeelChandler:Well,let’sjustsaythatKrogwillbefullyequippedtodestroytheuniverseagainintwelvetofourteenhoursPhoebe:Okay,soItotallytookcareofthebabiesallbymyself!Ifed‘em,bathed‘em,andput‘emtobedChandler:Andprotectedthemfromatornado(Monicaentersandherjawdropsinhorror)Monica:OhmyGodPhoebe:Iknow,thebabiesareasleepMonica:Phoebe,what,whathappenedhere!Phoebe:Ididit!Itookcareofthebabiesallbymyself!Monica:Butmyapartment!Chandler:WasthesettingofPhoebe’striumphMonica:Butthemess!Chandler:IsnotasimportantasthefactthatPhoebetookcareofthebabiesallbyherselfMonica:You’reright,you’rerightIshouldn’tfreakout‘CausethisiswhatwillhappenwhenyouandIhavebabies!Whenwillthatbe!Chandler:(pause)Phoebe,wouldyoutakealookatthismess!!!!Scene:Ross’sapartment,RachelispackingwhatshestillhasoverthereasRossentersRachel:(deadpan)OhhoneythankGodyou’rehome,IwasgettingworriedRoss:IpickedupthedivorcepapersUh,I’vealreadysignedeverythingandIputlittle‘X’swhereyouneedtosignRachel:Oh,little‘X’s!Great!Thatmakesupforeverything!Ross:Y’know,IIyou’vedonealotofstupidstufftoo!OkayRachel:Oh,nameonestupidthingthatisasstupidasthisone!Ross:Okay,howaboutyouflewtoLondontostopmywedding!Ah,howaboutyoutoldmeyoulovedmeafterIwasalreadymarried!Rachel:Hey!Waitaminute!Thatwasdifferent!IdidthosethingsbecauseIwasinlovewithyou!Ross:Yeah!Right!(Pause)Ross:You’rerightThat’sverydifferentSolet’s,let’sjustsignthepapersAllright(SitsdownandRachelkeepsstandingthere)WhatRachel:Nothing(Sitsdown)Ross:Okay,canwejustsignpleaseRachel:Uhhmm(JustasRachelfinishessigninghername,Rossyankseachpageoutoftheway)Ross:Congratulations(Getsuptoleave)Rachel:OkayRoss,we’rewaitaminuteUmm,Iuh,IkindahavealittleconfessionRoss:WhatRachel:Well,y’knowthiswholemarriagething,kindamyideaRoss:ExcusemeRachel:Well,rememberhowweweretoodrunktorememberanythingthenightweweremarriedRoss:YeahRachel:Anduh,yeah,Ididn’treally,Ididn’twanttosayanything,butitkindaitjust,itkindakeptcomingbacktome,andumm,rememberwewereinthecasinoandforsomereasonthoughtitwouldbefunnytoeatalotofgrapesAnduh,andIthoughtitwouldbefunnierifwegotmarriedSoasa,asacompromisewedecidedfirsttogetmarried,andthen(Rossjoinsin)toeatalotofgrapesSoumm,sorryIgotusintothismessRoss:SothenififImeanifyouthinkaboutit,thisisall(Pause)yourfaultRachel:Yeah,don’tpushitthoughRoss:I’vegottosayIknowIdivorcealotofwomen,neverthoughtIwouldbedivorcingyouRachel:IknowIalwaysthoughtifyouandIgotmarried,itwouldbetheonethatstuckAnditwouldn’tbeasecret,andwewouldn’thaveourweddingdinneratPizzaHut(Theybothlaugh)Ross:DidI,didIeventreatRachel:No,itwasonthehouse,itwas,itwasanewlywedspecialRoss:ThatmaybethemostdepressingthingI’veheardinmylifeIshouldprobablygetthesetomylawyer’sofficeRachel:Hey,thanksRoss,fortakingcareofallofthisRoss:Eh,noproblem(Theyhug)Rachel:I’mgonnaneedacopyofthoseRoss:Totally(Exits)EndingCreditsScene:Thestreet,JoeyismessingwithacarcoverandstillwearingthePorschestuffThisguyplayingstreetfootballcatchesapassnexttothecarcoverJoeyisfoolingaroundwithJoey:Hey!Hey!BecarefularoundmyPorsche!Woman:(thesameonefrombeforeapproaches)HiJoeyJoey:Hey!Howyoudoin’Woman:(toherfriend)HehasthemostamazingPorscheunderthere!Joey:I’dlovetoshowya,butIjusttuckedherinShe’ssleeping(Thewomenbothlaugh)Heyuh,wouldyoutwogirlsliketogoforadrink(Justthenthesameguywiththefootballdivestomakeacatch,landsonthecarcover,andcollapsesitItturnsoutthatJoeysetupabunchofboxestomakeitlooklikeaPorsche)End乔伊的保时捷真不敢相信你竟然没告诉我我们还没离婚。我这不是正准备告诉你么。什么时候?等到我们第一个私生子出世么?Ross还没拿到离婚协议书我们还是夫妇。欧上帝呀!Ross!好吧也许是我的不对可我真的无法再次面对失败的婚姻了。我插进来问个问题先你从那点看来这曾经是个成功的婚姻呢?Rach你想想其实这还是挺有意思的。算了还是什么都不要想的好。这真是个不可饶恕的过错我从心底里感到震惊。Phoebe我已经告诉她你知道了。又一个谎言你有毛病了吧!Ross只是随便问问你不会再和我们中别的什么人结婚了吧?噢!嘿有人钥匙掉了。噢是保时捷的钥匙。嘿Gunther这是你的么?是的我就是开它来的。我每小时才赚美元我攒了整整年!别瞎扯了!嘿有人掉了钥匙么?Joey你为什么不把它们放在失物招领箱呢?这儿有失物招领箱么?我的鞋!你掉了只鞋在这儿?等我到家才发现我才懒得穿着一只鞋走那么长的路回来取呢!好吧我去找那个人的车然后在挡风玻璃上留张条。好的他回来找钥匙的时候我只能把你的鞋子给他了。好的谢谢!噢太好了太好了你们都在呢!听我说你们明天能帮我照顾一下三只超级可爱的小狗狗么?噢好呀肯定会很有趣的。无所谓啦。好的那我明天早上把他们带过来。恩其实他们不是真的小狗狗他们是Frank和Alice的三胞胎。好的再见!喂喂喂什么?求求你们了求求你们了!就帮个忙吧!Frank和Alice让我帮忙看孩子我好紧张亚我原来从来没照顾过孩子!别担心Phoebe我们当然会帮忙了。我也没问题如果是小狗我反倒觉得可疑呢。别这样Chandler这是绝佳的练习机会如果如果有人带小孩来拜访的时候。车不错呀。可惜不是我的。挺喜欢你的车。是的当然是我的。开起来肯定很快吧?当然了而且很舒适你你喜欢绒毛座椅么?当然了!它正好有。这儿有我的箱子Ross那里也有可是我却没地方住!唉我现在很容易就胡思乱想。那我呢?我刚发现Denise出城之后就没人和我一起住了。也许也许我可以和你一起住Pheebs是呀也许你可以当我的室友!这主意不错吧!是呀!太好了!可是Denise什么时候回来呢?恩她说她月号回来。月号?也许她就是圣诞老人呢。噢瞧呀这是谁呀我老公我的小甜心。好了我们明天中午:上庭。我取来了所有的表我来搞定一切。当然了如果你说你来搞定所有事情的话我当然没有理由质疑你了。把表给我!好吧这次我要用我的方法办事我不希望你叽叽喳喳的插嘴。好吧Rach可是噢开始啦!Ross!我只是我为什么?你为什么这么做?我跟你说过的。我不想听什么“三次婚姻失败”了。如果你有两次失败的婚姻你就会懂了!好吧那我该谢谢你我现在有一次了。噢噢我要疯了!Ross我从来没有这么生气过!我那次说我们分开的时候呢?噢!Pheebs情况如何?很好呀我觉得都很顺利。你觉得他们开心么?我是不是说得太快了?没有啊我和你差不多。Pheebs一切都很顺利你瞧Chandler和小乖乖女Chandler。小乖乖女Chandler我原来在那里听过噢是的Ruben教练。Pheebs你那里忙完了赶快过来我这里也有情况了。不不行我们各自负责自己的宝宝。你瞧我正巧觉得它有问题呢。我们不应该人盯人的对付这些宝贝儿我们应该区域防守。什么意思?我只是觉得这样处理起来会简单一些如果我们都有各自负责的区域的话。Phoebe你可以负责给他们擦洗。而你呢Monica负责给他们换尿布而我则可以负责欣赏他们在我怀里那可爱的小模样。这听起来确实是挺不错的不过也许你该负责给他们擦洗。可是我是个新手不应该把我放在末区。这太有意思了!我们餐厅里就是这样摆盘子的。是么?可这并不是我点的菜啊!嘿!嗨宝贝们!噢今天是最开心的一天了。那辆那辆我有钥匙的保时捷还在那儿呢!真让人吃惊你竟然还拿着钥匙。你该看看我和那车在一块儿的时候人们是怎么对我的!他们对我特别友好他们想和我聊天不只是关于那辆车!有个人甚至给我股票投资提建议。什么股票投资?就是帮我赚钱买保时捷的呀你到底有没有在听?可是我想如果如果他们看见我一直在那儿傻站着的话他们也许会觉得那车不是我的。所以我准备洗车。Monica我可以借用一下你的水桶和肥皂么?当然了我有肥皂、海棉、抹布和车蜡。还有擦亮剂呢。可你自己连车都没有呀?我知道可是有一次我看见了一辆非常脏的汽车就在我们这栋前面所以我就把它给洗了。还有呢?还有另外辆别的。怪不得呢。Yeah它速度可达呢这还是在城里的如果开到城外我可以加速到。是么?你城外也有房子?当然了。好的回见。好的回见!嗨!这是我的车是么?嗯再给我分钟时间。什么?你在干什么?我我捡到这些钥匙现在只是想把它擦亮一些。可这是我的车呀。是的没错但蜡是我的。好吧我我不经常来这儿我不知道是你疯了还是把这当作是街头艺术表演?可是我能要回我的钥匙么?当然了给你。我帮你把车位留着。我不会回来了。为什么?我住在城外。是么?我也是。我不知道我为什么这么紧张。我也不知道为什么Frank和Alice为什么老是抱怨个不停。这看起来很容易么。是呀两个钟头和一辈子真的是差不多呀。瞧瞧这个瞧瞧这个!小宝宝醒的时候就会看见这个Krog了。Chandler你在干嘛?这东西会把他们的眼珠戳出来!他比这强大的多他可以毁灭整个宇宙!不Chandler他们会吞下那些小部件的!而且你瞧那些光滑的部分会把他们搞得一团糟他们不会吞任何东西的你们太过于多虑了我小的时候我妈还把我扔到碎玻璃堆里去呢什么?玻璃沙子管他什么呢.噢你看小Leslie在睡梦中舒展着身体。她太可爱了!你是什么时候开始不能把双腿伸到头后面的?噢我现在也可以亚。那你为什么现在还单身?好吧。我好好想了想也许你们是对的Krog可能不是个安全的玩具。是么?是什么让你改变主意的呢?我吞下了他的声速爆破枪。怎么会这样呢?我只是试着证明我是对的。可是结果却证明我是错的。现在它还卡在我喉咙里呢。真是的我们一直把注意力放在那些宝宝身上了可是却没人看着Chandler!好的你们是来领取离婚协议的是么是的法官大人这是我们填好的表你们申请上面说离婚是因为Geller先生精神上不稳定。好吧我脑子确实有毛病了。而且Geller先生还是个瘾君子。什么?是的海洛因和crackCrack根本就不是静脉注射毒品。鬼知道你是怎么用的。这儿还说婚前隐瞒自己的性取向?啊?什么?Ross别骗人了我发现那些杂志了!最后以至于你们无法继续这段婚姻。也确实只能这样了你是同性恋还有毒瘾。好吧对不起这太荒谬了!我我我没吸毒也不是同性恋。没有任何东西阻止我继续任何事情!我现在就继续我这段婚姻此时此刻!你没必要这么做。我们开始约会的时候如胶似漆。欧!如果你们俩现在还保持那种过分的关系的话那确实算是有问题了。Ross!法官大人我们的热情早在两年前就消逝殆尽了。您能把“继续过分的关系”加到纪录里面么?这记录里面的东西到底有什么是真的?恩我们确实是在Vegas结的婚那里的名字是好了基于我所听到的你们不够资格领取离婚证书.如果你们不想过了的话那就为离婚官司准备文件吧.好吧你现在满意了吧?你瞧你和你那些搞笑的表格都干了些什么!什么?我?那你呢?还有你那些什么如胶似漆的鬼话?那又怎么了?你还在敲什么?你没听到她的话么?我们领不到离婚证书了。别敲了!干嘛?还敲?嘿!别敲了!别敲了!别敲了!看见了么?看见了么?你还要我和这样的人一起生活!你们该出去了!好吧女士要么这样我来是为了离婚证书你给我我就走。Yeah!你们想到监狱过夜么?耽误您时间了!保时捷的车主把车取回去了。可你发现了开他衣服的钥匙?不我只是我只是喜欢别人认为我有保时捷车的那种感觉。别人会因为你穿着这身衣服而认为你有保时捷么?当然了!只有傻瓜才会自己没车却还穿着这身衣服不是么?是的当然了。恩而且只有天才才会吞下声速爆破枪。噢我吞过一次。Yeah我去开我的保时捷了。Joey你知道你并没有呀。干嘛你们这是干什么?我正在扮演我的角色呢。你告诉她吧!啊它好像移了位置戳的我好疼呀。好吧算了我们去急诊室吧!什么?不不行你们不能把他们留给我一个人照顾。我们在看孩子也。宝宝们睡着了一切都好办了你先一个人撑一下好么?可是你们不能把他们都留给我一个呀!我们可是一个战队!我们坚守着各自的区域!他们三个会联合起来对付我一个的。现在有个塑料东西卡在他喉咙里了我们要去医院。可是医生帮不了他呀它得要自然降解大概需要年吧。那是口香糖吧。(注:gum口香糖)我很确信是手枪。(注:gun手枪)好吧听着真得很疼我们走吧。男子汉可不会跑到医院去。如果是Krog他会怎么做呢?那小子怎么还没把我的车开回来!也许是因为钥匙在你手上?(保时捷)这都是你的错!我的错?是你威胁法官的!你还把记录机里面的纸都扯出来了呢!只有那样才会让他停下来呀。Hi!你们好呀Geller夫妇!别这么叫我们!法官不给我们离婚证书!我们之好打官司离婚了!你是不是撞上保时夹了?嘿!是保时捷!我来照顾你们完全没问题!你们都很安全不是么?好吧我要把这个泡泡当作是“当然了我也行!”好吧等我处理完这个脏尿布Leslie我会给你换个干净的。噢我不是有意吓唬你的我得收拾干净亚。不是么?要敢于面对这是Monica的家。我打碎了它好吧又怎么样呢?事情原本就是这样呀。好了完了。怎么只剩你们两个了?Leslie在哪里?算了你又不能回答Leslie你在哪里?LeslieLeslie这可是你说第一个字的绝佳时机呀!噢瞧瞧你!嘿!你可真有点儿调皮呀!天哪!你可不只是一点儿调皮而已!好吧它自己会干的。好了你和你弟弟、妹妹坐好他们到哪儿去了?嘿!你感觉怎么样?恩Krog在到小时内就又可以全副武装再次毁灭宇宙了。好吧我完全一个人照顾好了所有的宝宝。给他们喂食给他们洗澡送他们上床。而且还在龙卷风到来时保护他们?噢天哪!我知道孩子睡着了Phoebe这儿怎么了?是我我一个人照顾所有的孩子。可是我的房子!这可是Phoebe的得意之作。可是这儿一团糟亚。可这和Phoebe照料孩子的功劳相比又算得上什么呢?你说得对你说得对我太在意了。因为我和你有孩子以后也会这样的。你说什么时候呢?Phoebe你能不能看看这一团糟?噢亲爱的你总算回来了我好担心呀!我拿回来了离婚协议。我把所有的都签好了。我把你要签字的地方都划了个小"X"噢小"X"太好了一切都可以弥补了。你知道么?你还不是做了很多蠢事?噢那就说一个和这次一样傻的事情。好吧就说你那次飞到伦敦阻止我婚礼!还有你在我结婚后告诉我你还爱我。嘿!等一下这完全不同我做哪些事是因为我那时还爱你。是么?好吧!你说的对那完全是另外一回事。我们还是还是签协议吧。怎么了?没什么好吧开始签吧。Uhhmm祝贺你!好吧Ross等一下我我想做点儿忏悔。什么?这次结婚的事情也算是我的主意什么?还记得我们结婚那晚我们喝得太多什么都不记得了么?是的?我不是很想不是很想说不过一切都不停的在我眼前浮现还记得我们在俱乐部里面为了某个原因而吃一大堆葡萄取乐么?我觉得如果我们结婚的话可能会更高兴的。于是我们就决定折衷一下先结婚然后再去吃葡萄。结果就对不起把我们带到今天这样的局面。那么就是说如果仔细想来的话这都是你的错了?是的别说的太过分。我得说我和很多女人离过婚可我从来就没想过我会和你离婚。我知道。我总是想如果我们结婚我们会白头到老。这也不会是一个秘密而且我们不会在必胜客里面举行婚礼。最后是我是我请的客么?没有算在房间上了是特别为新婚夫妇准备的。这也许是我这辈子以来听过得最伤心的事情了。我该把这些送到我律师办公室了。嗨谢谢你Ross照料这一切。Eh没问题。我需要复制一份。当然了。嘿嘿!小心我的保时捷!嘿!Joey嘿!你们好!他那最好的保时捷就在这下面。我很想给你们展示一下不过我刚把它罩上它在睡觉呢。你们想去喝一杯么
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