Eye Contact眼神交流(国际商业文化)

Non-Verbal Language Eye Contact Topic: eye contact Abstract: this article centers on one of the most important non-verbal languages---eye contact, and the significance of eye contact in interpersonal communication, and my own experience of eye contact. Key words: eye contact, culture differences, Business, public speaking, daily life, relationships ● The Languages of Our Eyes Throughout human history, people have being always used body languages to communicate with each other. Messages are communicated through gestures, postures, facial expressions or eye contacts. In many situations, the way you say something is far more important than what you say. So if successful communication is the key to success, eye contact should be the key to the successful communication. The eyes are said to be “the window to the soul”---and they can reveal the deeper meaning behind the spoken word. While we can choose our words and control certain facial expressions, our eyes never lie. It portrays our thoughts, reflects our emotions, express our interest, boredom, surprise, approval, or disbelief. Without words ever being spoken, our eyes have power to attract, to judge, to frighten and to care. You have probably witnessed yourself how often parents can hush playful children just by giving them ‘a look’. Or how can a young couple flirt with each other without ever saying a single word. The language of our eyes is one of the most powerful and effective tools of non-verbal communication. And many times our success at a job interview, during business negotiations or on a first date depends on our ability to convey the right messages with our eyes. So it is important to learn how to read the body language of the eyes and interpret it correctly, especially when you are communicate with foreigners. ● Eye Contact in Different Cultures The amount of proper eye contact varies greatly from culture to culture. In western cultures, it is necessary to maintain eye contact. As a matter of fact, a Westerner might consider a lack of eye contact as a lack of interest or as a sign of untruthfulness. In countries like Spain, Italy and Greece, people like standing close to each other when they are talking, so eye contact is more frequent and lasts longer. But not for French people. Eye contact is considered too personal a gesture to use with strangers in a French social setting. For American, they take direct eye contact as a sigh of honesty and sincerity. A lack of eye contact may be considered impolite. And if you stare at others, it is considered rude and should be avoided. On the other hand, in many Asian cultures, people avoid eye contact to show respect. They do so when they talking with someone in senior positions or with someone older than themselves. Another example is that an Asian person might close his or her eyes or look down while listening to a speaker. So a western speaker might think the person is not interested. Habits like that can cause problems when people do not understand them. Therefore we should watch our eyes especially in other countries. ● Personal Ideas Eye contact is needed in many situations. For example, speaking in public is a kind of two-way communication, which needs eye contact from both sides. The speaker will certainly feel embarrassed when he sees that his audiences do not look at him. But if he doesn't look at his audience now and then, his audience also has the right not to listen to what he is saying. I used to do class presentation. At first, I’d like to bury my nose in my manuscript to read my speech all the time because of nervousness. But soon I found out that no one was listening to me. So I just changed my way by making eye contact with them now and then, and it works. Eye contact not only makes me become more confident, but also help the audience understand my idea better. So, you should make eye contact when you have a speech. Eye contact is also very important in interpersonal relationship. My own experience proves that if you like someone, you would always look into his or her eyes, which means that you are willing to share with him or her. But if you don’t like to be with him or her, you would probably refuse to look at her eyes because you want to ignore him or her. Later soon you will lose your friend. It is true when we are paying attention to a person, or something, eye contact reflects our concentration, our sincerity and our attitude. In other words, use eyes to communicate with others, not only means that you are confident, also indicates you respect to others. So it is necessary to make the proper eye contact, which can make your friendship forever and may lead you more friends. There are many eye expressions that we witness every day, such as, smiling eyes, shy eyes, blinking eyes, calculating eyes, squinting eyes, glowing eyes. In our life time, we would meet with different types of people from all walks of life, how to communicate with others' eye, is a compulsory course for everyone of everyday.