功夫熊猫电影英文字幕

Legend tells of a legendary warrior, whose kung fu skills were the stuff of legend Legend tells of a legendary warrior, whose Kung Fu skills were the stuff of legend. He travelled the land search of worthy foes. Evil Ox: I see you like to chew. Maybe you should chew on my fist. The warrior said nothing for his mouth was full. Then he swallowed. And then he spoke. Po: Enough talk. Let’s fight. He was so deadly in fact, that his enemies will go blind, from over exposure to pure awesomeness. Evil 1: My eyes! Evil 2: He’s too awesome! Rabbit 1: And attractive. Rabbit 2: How can we repay you? Po: There is no charge for awesomeness. Or attractiveness. It matted not how many foes he faced. They were no match for his voracity. Never before had a panda been so feared, and so loved. Even the most heroic heroes in all of China. The Furious Five. Bowed in respect to this great master. Monkey: We should hang out. Po: Agreed. But hanging out world have to wait. Cause when you’re facing the ten thousand demons of demon mountain. There is only one thing that matters and that ‘s… Monkey: Po！Get up! Tigress: You’ll be late for work. Po:What? Dad: Po… Get up! Hey, Po… What are you doing up there? Po: Ahh… nothing. Monkey, Mantis, Crane, Viper, Tigress… Roarrr! Ahh… Dad: Po… let’s go. You’re late for work. Po: Coming! Sorry Dad. Dad: Sorry doesn’t make the Noodles. What are you doing up there? All that noise? Po: Oh… nothing. Just had a crazy dream. Dad: About what? Uh? What were you dreaming about? Po: What was I… ah… I was dreaming about … Noodles! Dad: Noodles? You were really dreaming about noodles? Po: Uh… ya, what else would I be dreaming about? Oh, careful. That soup is…sharp! Dad: Oh! Happy day! My son finally having the noodle dream! You don’t know how long I have been waiting for this moment! This is a sign, Po. Po: Uh… a sign of what? Dad: You are almost ready to be entrusted with the secret ingredient, of my secret ingredient soup. And then you will fulfill your destiny and take over the restaurant. Just as I took over from my father who took over from his father who won it from a friend over a game of mahjong. Po: Dad, Dad, Dad, it was just a dream. Dad: No, it was THE DREAM. We’re noodle folk. Broth runs through our veins. Po: But Dad, didn’t you ever… well… wanted to do something else? Something beside noodles? Dad: Actually, when I was young and crazy. I thought about running away and learning how to make tofu. Po: So, why didn’t you…? Dad: Oh, because it was a stupid dream. Can you imagine me making tofu? Ha, ha, ha, TOFU, no, we all have our place in this world. Mine is here, and yours is… Po: I know “is here”. Dad: No! It’s tables 2,5,7 and 12. Service with a smile. Master Shifu: Well done, students…if you were trying to disappoint me. Tigress, you need more ferocity. Monkey, greater speed. Crane, height. Viper, subtlety. Mantis... Zeng: Master Shifu… Master Shifu: What? Zeng: It… it’s Master Oogway, he wants to see you. Master Shifu: Master Oogway, you summoned me? Is something wrong? Master Oogway: Why must something be wrong for me to want to see my old friend? Master Shifu: So, nothing is wrong? Master Oogway: Well, I didn’t say that. Master Shifu: You were saying…? Master Oogway: I have had a vision. Tai Lung will return. Master Shifu: That is impossible. He’s in prison. Master Oogway: Nothing is impossible. Master Shifu: Zeng, fly to Chordom Prison. Tell them to double the guards, double the weapons…double everything! Tai Lung does not leave that prison. Zeng: Yes, Master Shifu! Master Oogway: One often meets his destiny on the road he takes to avoid it. Master Shifu: We have to do something. We can’t just have him march in the valley. And take his revenge, he’ll, he’ll… Master Oogway: Your mind is like this water, my friend. When it is agitated…it becomes difficult to see. But if you allow it to settle, the answer becomes clear. Master Shifu: The Dragon’s scroll. Master Oogway: It is time. Master Shifu: But who? Who is worthy to be trusted with the secret to limitless power? To become the Dragon Warrior? Master Oogway: I don’t know. Po: Excuse me… Sorry…oh…sorry. Pig1: Hey, watch it, Po. Mom Rabbit: Oh! Po: Sorry…ah…oop! Sorry, a thousand pardon. …what? Master Oogway is choosing Dragon Warrior TODAY! Everyone, everyone, go, get to the Jade Palace! One of the five is going to get the Dragon’s Scroll. We have been waiting a thousand years for this. Just take the bowl! This is the greatest day in Kung Fu history! Don’t worry about it, just go! Old Dad: Po! Where are you going? Po: …To the… Jade Palace… Old Dad: But you’re forgetting your noodle cart. The whole valley will be there and you will sell noodle to all of them. Po: Selling noodles? But Dad, you know I was kind of thinking, maybe I… Old Dad: Ya? Po: I was kind of thinking, maybe I … ahha…could also sell the bean buns. They’re about to go bad. Old Dad: That’s my boy! I told you that dream was a sign! Po: Ya … I’m glad I had it. Baby Rabbit1: I’m the Dragon Warrior! Baby Rabbit2: Me, too! Po: Almost there…what? No! Pig: sorry Po. We’ll bring you back a souvenir. Po: No. I’ll bring me back a souvenir. Master Shifu: It is a historic day, isn’t it, Master Oogway? Master Oogway: Yes. The one I feared I would not live to see. Are your students ready? Master Shifu: Yes, Master Oogway. Master Oogway: Now know this, old friend…whomever I chose will not only bring peace to the valley, but also to you. Ceremony Host: Let the tournament begin! Po: No, no, no, wait! I’m coming. Hey, open the door! Let me in! Ceremony Host: Citizens of the Valley of Peace. It is my great honor to present to you, Tigress, Viper, Crane, Monkey, Mantis! The Furious Five! Po: Ah…ah…ah… Po: They are the Furious five! Ah…ah… ouch! Ceremony Host: Warriors prepare! Po: Blast, no, quick Po. Ceremony Host: Ready for battle! Po: The thousand tons of fire! Ho… ha… howw! Wow! Look at that! Hey, get out the way! Po: Uhh…oh…ohh! Ah…ah…ah! Hiyaah…ouch! Ceremony Host: And finally, Master Tigress. Believe me, citizens, you have not seen anything yet. Po: I know! Ceremony Host: Master Tigress faces Iron Arms and its Blades of Death. Master Oogway: I sense the Dragon Warrior is among us. Master Shifu: Citizens of the Valley of Peace, Master Oogway will now choose the Dragon Warrior! Po: Hah… butta… No, no, no, wait! Yaa… Po: ahh. Ha..ha… haah! Po: Ha… ha… haah! Dad: Po! What are you doing? Po: What does it look like I’m doing? …stop, stop! I’m going to see the Dragon Warrior! Dad: But I don’t understand! You finally have the noodle dream! Po: I lied, I don’t dream about noodles, Dad! I love Kung Fu! Uuu! Dad: Oh, come on, son, let’s get back to work. Po: Heay… Okay… …Ahh…ahh…ahh! Dad: Po! Po: Ahh…ahh… come back! Oh! Po: Oh, what’s going on…where… ah … what do you point… Oh…Okay, sorry, I just wanted to see who the Dragon Warrior was… Master Oogway: How interesting! Tigress: Master, are you pointing at me? Master Oogway: Him. Po: Who? Master Oogway: You. Po: Me? Master Oogway: The universe has brought us the Dragon Warrior. Po: What? Furious Five: What? Master Shifu: What? Dad: What? Master Shifu: Stop, wait, who told you to… …Master Oogway, wait! That crabby panda can’t possibly be the answer to our problem. You were about to appoint the Tigress. And that thing fell in front of her! That was just an accident! Master Oogway: There are no accidents. Tigress: Forgive us, Master. We have failed you. Master Shifu: No. If the panda has not quit by morning, then I would have failed you. Zeng: Wait, wait, wait! I bring a message from Master Shifu. Guard: What? Double the guard? Extra precautions? Zeng: ‘Your prison may not be adequate’? Guard: You doubt my prison secutity? Zeng: Absolutely not! Shifu does. I’m just the messager. Guard: I’ll give you a massage for your Master Shifu. Escape from Chordom Prison is impossible. Guard: Impressive, isn’t it? Zeng: Yes, very impressive. It is very impressive. Guard: One way in, and one way out. One thousand guards and one prisoner. Zeng: Yes, except that prisoner is Tai Lung. Guard: Take us down. Zeng: Ahh…ahh…ahh… oh…oo….oh.. Oh MY!… Guard: Behold Tai Lung… Zeng: I’ll… umm… I’ll just wait right here. Guard: It’s nothing to worry about. It’s perfectly safe. Both posts. At the ready. Zeng: What, Posts? Guard: Hey, tough guy, did you hear? Oogway is finally going to give someone the Dragon Scroll and it’s not going to be you. Zeng: What are you doing? Don’t get him mad! Guard: What is he going to do about it? I’ve got him completely immobilized. Haa… haa… ha… ha…! Oh! Did I step on the wooly kiddy’s tail? Zeng: I’m gonna…I’ve seen enough. I’m gonna tell Shifu that he has nothing to worry about. Guard: No, he doesn’t. Zeng: Okay, I’ll tell him that. Guard: Hmm… Zeng: Can we please go now? Po: Oh, wait a second. I think there has been a slight mistake. Err… everyone seems to think I’m err…aah… the Sacred Hall of Warriors. No way. … Look at this place! Master Flying-Rhino’s armour! With authentic battle damage! Wow… the Sword of Heroes! Said to be so sharp, you can cut yourself just by looking! Ahh! Oww! The invisible Dragon of Destiny. Uuhhs… I’ve only seen paintings of that painting! Ahh…ah…ha…ha…ha… Heeyah…yah…aah…ah…ah… Noo…! Ho… oh, oh, oh, oh… The legendary Urn of Whispering Warriors! Said to contain souls of the entire Tenshu army. Hello? Master Shifu: Have you finished sightseeing? Po: Sorry, I should have come to see you first. Master Shifu: My patience is running thin. Po: Ohh? Well, I mean, it’s not like you are going anywhere. Master Shifu: You turn around. Po: Sure. Hey, how is it going? How do you get five… Master Shifu! Ooh! ... Ohh … whooo … Someone broke that… but I’m going to fix it… I’ll… do you have some glue…… aah… ouch… ooo! I’m a splinter. Master Shifu: So you are the legendary Dragon Warrior, hmm? Po:… Ahh, I guess so…? Master Shifu: Wrong! You’re not the Dragon Warrior! You will never be the Dragon Warrior until you have learned the secret of the Dragon Scroll. Po: Wow… so… How does this work? Do you have a ladder? A trampoline or…? Master Shifu: Umph… you think it is that easy that I’m just going to hand you the secret to limitless power? Po: No! I … Master Shifu: One must first master the highest level of Kung Fu and that is clearly impossible if that one is someone like you. Po: Someone like me? Master Shifu: Yes! Look at you! This fat buttock. Flabby arms. Po: Those are sensitive in the flabby parts. Master Shifu: And this ridiculous belly… Po: Hey… whoo… Master Shifu: And utter disregard for personal hygiene… Po: Now wait a minute. That’s a little uncalled for. Master Shifu: don’t stand that close. I can smell your breath. Po: Listen, Oogway said that I was the… uh… the Wushi Finger Hold! Never….! Master Shifu don’t… Master Shifu: Haa… oh… you know this hold? Po: Developed by Master Wushi in the 3rd dynasty. Master Shifu: Yes. Oh, then you must know what happens when I flex my pinky. Po: No, no, no… Master Shifu: You know the hardest part of this? The hardest part is cleaning up afterwards. Humm… Po: Okay. Okay, take it easy. Master Shifu: Now listen closely, Panda. Oogway may have picked you, but when I’m through with you, I promise you, you’re going to wish he hadn’t. Are we clear? Po: Yes, we’re clear, we’re clear. We are so clear. Master Shifu: Good… hmm…. Hmm… hmm… I can’t wait to get started. Master Shifu: Let’s begin. Po: Wait, wait, wait. Now? Master Shifu: Yes, now. Unless you think that the great Oogway was wrong and you were not the Dragon Warrior. Po: Okay. Well, I don’t know if I can do all of those moves. Master Shifu: Well, if we don’t try, we will never know, will we? Po: Yes, it’s just, maybe we can find something more suited to my level. Master Shifu: And what level is that? Po: Well you know I’m not a master, but let’s just start at zero. Level zero. Master Shifu: There is no such thing as level zero. Po: Hey, maybe I can start with that. Master Shifu: That? We use that for training children. And poping the door open when it is hot. But if you insist… Po: Wow… the Furious Five! You’re so much bigger than your action figures. Except for you, mantis. You’re about the same. Master Shifu: Go ahead, panda, show us what you can do! Po: Ahh… are they going to watch? Or should I just wait until they get back to work or something? Master Shifu: Hit it. Po: Okay, yeah, I mean, I just ate, and so, I’m still digesting, so my Kung Fu meight not be as good as later on. Master Shifu: Just hit it. Po: What’d you got? You’re got nothing cos’ I got it right here. You picking on my friends? Get ready to fell the thunder. Come on, crazy feet. What’re you going to do about crazy feet? Come on, I’m a blur. I’m a blur. You’ve never seen Bear style. You’ve only seen Praying Mantis. Or Monkey style. Imagine snake-kiddy Snake. Master Shifu: Would you hit it!? Po: Alright. Alright. Master Shifu: Why don’t you try again? A little harder. Po: How’s that? Oohhh… oh, that hurts! Master Shifu: This will be easier than I thought. Po: Feeling a little nausea… ouch, ouch, ouch! Oohh… my tenders… Po: … how did I do? Master Shifu: There is now a level zero. Monkey: No words. Crane: Don’t deny that. Tigress: I don’t understand what Master Oogway was thinking. Viper: Poor guy is going to get himself killed. Crane: He is so fighty. The Dragon Warrior fell out of the sky in a ball of fire. Mantis: When he walks, the very ground shakes. Tigress: One would think that Master Oogway would choose someone who actually knew Kung Fu. Crane: Ya. Or could at least touch his toes. Monkey: Or even see his toes. Po: Okay… great… ooouuuch! …. Oh hey. Hi. You’re up? Crane: Am now. Po: I was just…er…someday…eh? The Kung Fu stuff is hard work, right? Your biceps sore… Crane: I’ve had a long and rather disappointing day, so… er…ya… I should probably get to sleep now. Po: Ya, ya,… of course…. Crane: Okay. Thanks. Po: It’s just, I’m such a big fan… You guys were so totally amazing at the battle of the Weeping River. Outnumbered. A thousand to one. But you didn’t stop. You just,…. Oh, sorry about that…. Crane: ahh…look, you don’t belong here. Po: Er… I know, I know. You’re right. I don’t have it. It’s just, my whole life, I dreamed of… Crane”: No, no, no. I mean you don’t belong here, I mean in this room. But this is my room. Property of Crane. Po: Oh, okay, right, right. So… ya, you want to get to sleep. Keeping you up. We’ve got big things tomorrow. Alright. You’re awesome, the last thing I’m going to say. Okay, bye-bye. Po: What was that? Crane: I didn’t say anything. Okay. Alright. Goodnight. Sleep well. Po: Seem a little bit awkward. Master Tigress, didn’t mean to wake you. Justa… Tigress: You don’t belong here. Po: Ah ya… ya… of course… this is your room… Tigress: I mean you don’t belong in the Jade Palace. You’re a disgrace to Kung Fu and if you have any respect of who we are, and what we do, you will be gone by morning. Po: Big fan! Master Oogway: I see you’ve found the Sacred Peach Tree of Heavenly Wisdom. Po: Is that what this is? I’m so sorry. I thought it was just a regular peach tree. Master Oogway: I understand, you eat when you are upset. Po: Upset? I’m not upset. Why would I be upset!? Master Oogway: So, why are you upset? Po: I probably sucked more today than anyone in the history of Kung Fu. In the history of China. In the history of sucking. Master Oogway: Probably. Po: And the five MAN, you should have seen them, they totally hate me. Master Oogway: Totally. Po: How’s Shifu ever going to turn me into the Dragon Warrior? I mean I’m not like the five, I’ve got no claws, no wings, no venom. Even Mantis got those thingies. May be I should just quit and go back to making noodles. Master Oogway: Quit? Don’t quit. Noodles? Don’t noodles. You’re too concerned with what was and what will be. There’s a saying: Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the “present” . Guard: Oh, no! Zeng: What’s happening? Guards: To your battle stations! Go! Go! Go! Guard: Fire Cross-Bow! Fire! Fire! Zeng: Tai Lung is free! I must warn Shifu. Guard: You’re not going anywhere. Neither is he! Let go of me. Bring it up! Wait! Bring it back! Zeng: He’s going this way. Guard: He won’t get far. Archers! Zeng: We are dead. So very, very dead. Guard: Ha…ha…. Not yet, we’re not. Now! Zeng: Can we run now? Guard: Yes. Tai Lung: I am glad shifu sent you. I was beginning to feel I’m being forgotten. Fly back there and tell them, the real Dragon Warrior is coming home. Furious Five: Good morning, Master! Master Shifu: Panda! Panda! Wake up! Hmm.. hmm.. hmm.. He’s quit. Viper: What do we do now, master, with the Panda gone? Who will be the Dragon Warrior? Master Shifu: all we can do is resume our training and trust that in time the true Dragon Warrior will be revealed. …. What are you doing here? Po: Haa… hey, good morning, Master. I thought I’ll warm up a little. Master Shifu: You’re stuck. Po: Stuck? ….no… what? …stuck? No… this is one of the… ….ya… I’m stuck. Master Shifu: Help him. Crane: Oh, dear. Lift on three. One, two, … Po: thank you. Crane: Don’t mention it. Po: No, really, I appreciate it… Crane: Ever! Master Shifu: You actually thought you could learn to do a full split in one night. It takes years to develop one’s flexibility. And years longer to apply it in combat. …Put that down! The only souvenirs we collect here are bloody knuckles and broken bones. Po: Yaa… ha… ha… ha. Excellent! Master Shifu: Let’s get started. Viper: Are you ready? Po: I was born ready… oww! Oww!... Oh! Viper: I’m sorry brother. I thought you said you’re ready. Po: That was awesome! Let’s go again! Master Shifu: I’ve been taking it easy on you, Panda. But no more. Your next opponent will be me. Po: Alright. Ya.. Let’s go! Master Shifu: Step forth! … The true path to victory is to find your opponent’s weakness… And make him suffer for it. Po: Oh, yeah! Master Shifu: To take his strength and use it against him. Until he finally falls or quits. Po: But a real warrior never quits. Just don’t worry Master, I’ll never quit! Tigress: If he is smart he won’t come back up those steps. Monkey: But he will. Viper: He is not going to quit, is he? Mantis: He’s not going to quit bouncing. I’ll tell you that. Po: Oouch! I thought you said acupuncture will make me feel better. Mantis: Trust me, it will. It’s just not easy finding right nerve points under all this… Po: Fat? Mantis: Fur! I was going to say fur. Po: Sure you were. Mantis: Who am I to judge a warrior based on his size? So I mean, look at me. I’m over here. Po: Ahh! Viper: May be you should take a look at this again. Mantis: Ohh… Okay. Po: Ooch! Stop! Stop it! Eee… ouch! … I know Master Shifu is trying to inspire me at all. But if I didn’t know any better I’ll say he’s trying to get rid of me. Mantis: I know he can seem like heartless. Po: Aaaahh…! Mantis: But you know he wasn’t always like that. Viper: According to legend there was once a time when Master Shifu actually used to smile… Mantis: No! Viper: Yes! But that was before… Po: Before what? Tigress: Before Tai Lung. Crane: Aah..ya. we are not really suppose to talk about him. Tigress: Well, if he is going to stay here, he should know. Po: Guys, guys, I know about Tai Lung…He was a student…. The first to ever master the 1000 scrolls of Kung Fu…. And then he turned bad and now he’s in jail. Tigress: he wasn’t just a student. Shifu found him as a cub. And he raised him as his son. And when the boy showed talent in Kung Fu, Shifu trained him. He believed in him. He told him he was destined for greatness. It was never enough for Tai Lung. He wanted the Dragon Scroll. But Oogway saw darkness in his heart and refused. Outraged, Tai Lung laid waste to the Valley. He tried to take the Scroll by force. And Shifu has to destroy what he had created. But how could he? Shifu loved Tai Lung like he never loved anyone before. What’s it . And now he has a chance to make things right. To